connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
