Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
