Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
do nipples grow back?
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