I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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