Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
