im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
