I got chris browned last night
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
