I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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