I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
