i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm like, not good at living.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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