I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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