and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
