Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
