Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize