i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
