Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Randomize
