actually, I'm a sock model
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
