I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize