Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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