What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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