My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
