Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
