I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
