therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
