So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
