I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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