I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
