I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
