My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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