don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
