just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
