hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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