Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
