a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
