its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
