It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
