i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
There's always time for handjobs
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You were trust falling into bushes
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
