wake up i wanna do it froggy style
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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