Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
She said her name was "party"
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
