I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
