I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Drake has all the answers
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
