I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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