i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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