Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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