"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
