Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
