All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
