If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
