$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
