these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
